DEAR ABBY: My husband's family are hypocrites! They talk about everyone and their problems, yet when something arises in their family, they want it kept hush-hush.
My sister-in-law, "Gina," had a baby recently. Her husband, "Allan," was suspicious because their sexual relations had stopped years ago. He did a store-bought DNA test (twice) and realized the baby was not his. When he confronted her, she wouldn't tell him who the father is, but said she had discussed the pregnancy with the father, and they had decided it would be best for her to raise the baby as her husband's.
Well, Allan and Gina are now getting divorced, and he's having his name removed from the baby's birth certificate. Of course, everyone but me wants this to stay quiet. I want the wife of the man to know, and I want all the people my in-laws trash all the time to know!
Perhaps this seems mean, but dang it, why shouldn't everyone know that Gina isn't Miss Perfect? What do you think?
- Ticked Off in Louisiana
DEAR TICKED OFF: Please don't act on impulse. I think that as disgusted as you are with your in-laws, you should keep your mouth shut. If you spread this around, it could become the talk of the community and eventually embarrass the child, who is blameless in all this.
DEAR ABBY: I use public transportation to commute to and from work. I use the time to read and unwind from my day. People often start talking to me, and I find myself trapped for the next 45 minutes listening to an unwelcome monologue about their lives. The fact that I have earplugs in and a book on my lap is no deterrent.
I don't want to be rude. What's the best way to tell someone I prefer to chill out and not listen to his/her ramblings?
- Bookworm in Calgary, Canada
DEAR BOOKWORM: Smile at the person and say, "I need this time to catch up on my reading." That's asserting your right to privacy, and it's not rude.