Wednesday, December 17, 2014

She wants monogamy, but that's not his style

DEAR ABBY: I have met a darling man I'm compatible with in every way. My problem is his past. From what he says, he has never had a monogamous relationship, even during his marriage. After the divorce he pursued anything female.

When we are out at a club or a concert, I constantly encounter women he has been with. He tells me he is happy for the first time in his life and he would never cheat on me.

I have never been the jealous type, but I just don't want to be the woman everyone is laughing at because they know his history. I need to move past this or move on, I guess.

- The Current Woman

DEAR CURRENT WOMAN: It's time to ask yourself (not me) if you would be willing to tolerate his fooling around if you were his wife. Some women - the wives of attractive or powerful men - are open-minded about it if their husbands are discreet. The real question is, are you?

 

DEAR ABBY: I am upset with myself for getting my granddaughter the cellphone she begged me for. I wondered why she was feeling tired in the mornings until I caught her on the phone at 4 a.m. She can't get dressed in the morning because she's texting every two minutes.

She wasn't like this until she got this new boyfriend. It is consuming her life, morning, noon and night.

- Frustrated Grandma

DEAR GRANDMA: As the adult in your household, it's up to you to assert control. If your granddaughter lives with you, by all means talk to the boyfriend's parents about this.

But equally important, enforce cellphone limits. If you think she can't be trusted not to use it after lights-out, see that she gives you her phone at bedtime. In the morning, return it to her once she's dressed and ready for school.

Dear Abby
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