Dear Abby: Girl confused about past abuse

DEAR ABBY

My grandfather recently went to jail for having child pornography on his laptop. The lawyers and everyone else say he molested me and my sister. I almost had to testify. I'm only 13 and have talked with people, but they don't get it. I don't want to talk to a therapist or anything, but my mom and aunt think I should. Should I? I learned about this two years ago, but I still feel sad. I feel uncomfortable talking about it with anyone but my friends. I write sad poetry to express my feelings and it helps. I don't know what to do. I'm stuck in a rut. What should I be feeling? Do I need a therapist?

- Unsure of My Feelings

DEAR UNSURE: If your grandfather is in jail, and "the lawyers and everyone else" say he molested you and your sister, then he probably did. The two of you may not have understood what was happening because he led you to believe what he was doing was normal. (This is a common method for molesters.) You may be sad because your trust was violated. Talking with a therapist is not a punishment. It's actually a privilege, and I hope that you and your sister will take advantage of it. A therapist can give you insight. Your mom and your aunt have your best interests at heart, so please listen to them. A therapist can help you open up, and your sadness will dissipate.