Dear Abby: Mom turns daughter's wedding into a battle with ex-husband

DEAR ABBY:

My ex-wife, "Gloria," and I have been divorced eight years, but have managed to remain civil to each other.

Last year, my daughter had a birthday party to which I wanted to bring a date. Gloria decided that she would not attend because it would be "hurtful" to see me with another woman. After my daughter called me in tears, I canceled my date and went to the party alone.

Now my daughter is about to be married and I want to bring a date to the ceremony. Again, Gloria has announced that she will forgo the pleasure of seeing our daughter get married "so I can have my way and prove to the world I'm able to get a date."

I foresee a host of problems in the future if Gloria's behavior continues. Your thoughts, Abby?

- Arizona Dad in Conflict

DEAR ARIZONA DAD: Clearly you have gotten on with your life and Gloria hasn't. By now your ex should have adjusted to the fact that you have separate lives.

One solution would be for Gloria to bring a companion of her own to the wedding. Another would be for you to sit with your ex during the ceremony and with your girlfriend at the reception.

If you don't end your ex's game- playing, what will wind up happening is you having to alternate celebrating milestone events in your daughter's and eventual grandchildren's lives.