Dear Abby: Woman with husband and lover wants one big happy family

DEAR ABBY: You printed a letter from one of your readers who was upset over her son's polyamorous relationship. Now that my triad is ready to come out to my boyfriend's family, I feel the need to ask your advice.

My husband and I have been together 10 years. We started out as swingers. When we met my now-boyfriend, it became apparent that it was going to be more serious. Our arrangement is a "V" triad, meaning I am involved with two (husband and boyfriend), but they are not involved with each other.

My boyfriend's family is conservative and they know he lives with a married couple. We've all spent time together, and I think they like me. Of course, they don't know I'm romantically involved with their son. What's the best way to tell them about our triad? Please sign me . . .

- Nowhere and Everywhere

DEAR N AND E: You didn't say how long your boyfriend has been living with you and your husband, but if it has been any length of time and his parents know he isn't involved with anyone else, it's possible they already have some suspicions.

Because they are conservative, if I were you I wouldn't shatter their illusions.

If you feel you MUST disclose the information, then do it in the same way that you have explained it to me. But don't expect them to jump for joy.