I've been seeing someone for a year, and my daughter can't stand him. He's a nice guy. My daughter said she doesn't have a reason, but she just doesn't like him and doesn't want him around.
I've told her it's my choice, my house, and I can have company (he has never stayed overnight and has very rarely been over for meals). Occasionally we go out and he picks me up at home.
Otherwise, 99 percent of the time I see him is when my daughter is at her dad's house. I've told her she has to be civil, because he's my guest, but she heads to the basement or to a friend's house whenever he is around.
What if I end up with him, and she won't tolerate him?
Must I choose one or the other? Should I tell her that either he comes with me to her wedding or other events - or I won't go?
Holidays are coming up. I don't want to exclude him from the holiday meal.
- Worried Mom
Dear Worried: Let's assume that you have ruled out anything sinister here and that the only thing "wrong" with your guy is that you choose to be with him.
Keep in mind that for your girl, this relationship represents a huge change. Spend plenty of time with your daughter. And you should expect her to spend more, not less, time in proximity to you with your guy.
Include him in events she can't flee from, but which aren't too intimate. Do not issue ultimatums, which will only raise the stakes. Over the holidays, keep things very low-key, but if you want to include him in dinner, then do.
|
|
|
|
|
|
NEWS
Philly.com Promotions
