Tuesday, September 16, 2014
Inquirer Daily News

Hate the PPA? Tell me why

We've all heard - or told - horror stories about the Philadelphia Parking Authority's inexplicably gleeful abuse of power. But the tale I'll tell in my column tomorrow is so far beyond the pale, it gives "callous," "outrageous" and "cruel" new meaning. Stay tuned.

Hate the PPA? Tell me why

We've all heard - or told  - horror stories about the Philadelphia Parking Authority's inexplicably gleeful abuse of power. But the tale I'll tell in my column tomorrow is so far beyond the pale, it gives "callous," "outrageous" and "cruel" new meaning. Stay tuned.

Meantime, help me count all the ways we loathe the PPA. What are your Top Ten Reasons to Hate the PPA?  I'll excerpt the best ones for tomorrow's paper. 

But first, allow my fabulously witty colleague, Daily News cartoonist and graphic artist extraordinaire Brad Guigar, to kick things off.

Let'er rip, Brad!

 1. At least when that loverboy at the office writes notes to your wife, you know you're not going to be stuck with the tab.

 2. Three words: "Hide and cite."

 3. Parking signs written by the criminally insane. 

4. That arrogant way they snap the windshield wiper down.

 5. The tickets I don't mind. It's when they write snide comments on the bottom, like: "If you make love the way you park..."

 6. I hate the huge statues and ostentatious buildings and --  wait. That's the reason I hate the WPA.

 7. Remember that story about the PPA officer who realized that he had made a mistake and that the driver he was arguing with actually didn't deserve a ticket so he apologized and ripped up the ticket, promising to be more careful in the future? Me neither.

 8. If you're gonna write a ticket, then write it. You do not need to whistle the theme to "The Good, the Bad and the Ugly."

 9. I prefer the old parking meters. "Kiosk" sounds like some kinda Rooskie plot!

 ...and the number one reason I hate the PPA...

 10. Seventy-six bucks?! "Violation" is the polite term for it!

 

Ronnie Polaneczky Daily News Columnist
About this blog

When my phone rings here at the Daily News, nine times out of ten the caller begins the conversation with, “Yeah, so what happened was…”.

Because this is Philly, the caller doesn’t say, “My name is Bob” – or Mary – “and I wonder if I could have a moment of your time?” Philadelphians are too direct for that. They just say, “Yeah, so what happened was…”, and then tumble into a tale they think oughta be shared with a wider audience. I love getting these calls (even the ones where it becomes clear, after 30 seconds, where the caller sowed the seeds of his own misery), because they give me chance to connect with fellow citizens in a way that no other job allows. Well, okay, no other job for which I’m remotely qualified.

That’s why my blog is titled “So What Happened Was…”. To me, it’s the quintessentially Philly way of saying, “Once upon a time.” When I hear it, I know a good story is coming. And I can’t wait to see how it turns out.

Ronnie Polaneczky has been an award-winning columnist for The Philadelphia Daily News since 1999, offering a front-steps perspective on every aspect of city life, from the sublime to the stupid. In her past life, she was the editor-in-chief of Atlantic City Magazine, associate editor at Philadelphia Magazine and a fulltime freelancer published in Ladies Home Journal, Good Housekeeping, Redbook, Reader's Digest, Men's Health, MarieClaire and others. She lives with her husband, daughter and various pets in the city's Fairmount section, where she dreams of one day singing The National Anthem at an Eagles game. In addition to her column and blog, you can enjoy Ronnie's musings in podcast form here.


Read more from Ronnie Polaneczky at Earth to Philly, the Daily News blog on anything and everything "Green Reach Ronnie at polaner@phillynews.com.

Ronnie Polaneczky Daily News Columnist
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