Who's got $9,500 and wants to buy the Madonna 'Sex' fish?

Remember Sex? It was Madonna's 1992 NSFW coffee table book full of softcore porn with a surrealist twist. One of the iconic images from the book features a fully nude Madonna leaning back on a massive, bronze fish sculpture in Florida.That fish's name is Otto and he's looking for a new home.

A "Famous Madonna SEX Fish Seeking New Owner" posting recently popped up on eBay, indicating that for the low, low price of $9,500, Otto the Great Bronze Fish could be yours.

Luckily for everyone with a Wi-Fi connection, the owner wrote the posting from Otto's perspective.

It’s been over 21 years, but I still savor the memory of Madonna’s naked body, and I am definitely better for the experience. Trust me, Madonna was superfine in her prime and now you can amuse and delight yourself and your friends by re-creating the iconic pose that captured her so beautifully. You will be the auteur as I’m ready and primed for new adventures!

I know what you're asking and, yes, Otto the Great Bronze Fish is a functional fountain. Also, he weighs 300 pounds. The owner will pay to have Otto crated, but you're going to have to pay for shipping out of pocket.

So, yeah... If anyone wants to hook us up with $9,500, go ahead and DM me. We promise to set him up at the office and you can come visit whenever. [eBay]