Eccentric, Silicon Valley startup bros with all the cash to spare have apparently been taking advantage of the services offered by Goldbely—a company that looks to connect folks with the iconic tastes of their hometowns.
Gawker's Valleywag expanded on Goldbely, the type of people who are taking advantage of the door-to-door delivery, the different varieties of food available for purchase, and the $3 million investment the company recently procured. You can search through the company's menu by region and state. From the fine state of Pennsylvania, you can order ShooFly Pie from the Amish country and, of course, Philly cheesesteaks.
Taking into account the glowing recommendation of Vanessa Torrivilla the Food Wench (seriously, guys?), how could we not try sending some cheesesteaks coast-to-coast?
Tony Yacenda is the "cinematic genius" behind that Brett Favre parody of LeBron's Nike commercial that went viral a few years back. You might have also seen his "Shark Pool: Official Trailer" and that fake fireworks campaign ad that made the rounds last Fourth of July.
He's a Philly transplant who made the move to the West Coast to
see his name in lights become a typical, pretentious Los Angeles d*****bag start a career in the film industry. Out in L.A., he watches the Birds with other Chesco natives like P.J. McCabe and Blake Wexler.
McCabe is an actor you might know from last year's critically acclaimed indie project/festival darling Funeral Kings (which is available on Netflix) or as the driver from that one Honda Civic commercial with the Outasight song. Wexler is a standup comedian, a writer for Key & Peele, a regular on The Todd Glass Show and the "smug piece of sh**" getting punched in the face in this video from the James Franco Roast on Comedy Central.
After hearing about Goldbely, we figured that Thursday night—when Andy Reid returned to the Linc, Donovan McNabb's number was retired, and the Eagles (eventually) blew a game to an AFC West team in typical Philadelphia fashion—would be the perfect occasion to send the guys a taste of home.
I reached out to Goldbely via the chat function on their website. The guy who lent a hand was particularly helpful and entertaining. While checking to make sure that our order would be able to reach the guys in Hollywood by kickoff, he revealed that he was a Giants fan and even managed to sneak in a joke or six about
Mr. Glass Michael Vick and his rib cage.
An individual cheesesteak from Campo's ordered via Goldbely will set you back $90. But, the four-pack is a bit of a better deal. For $140 you can send four steaks (or Italian hoagies, if that's your thing), along with a few bags of Herr's chips and some soft pretzels. Our order was officially placed on Wednesday afternoon and was shipped before 7 p.m. that evening.
We were provided with a tracking number so that we could follow the package's progress across the country and a given an ETA of 8 p.m. EST at the latest.
A little before 7 p.m. EST I received a confirmation text from Tony to let me know that the package had arrived in time.
A dream realized.
The package contained all four cheesesteaks (chilled) and the essential, Philadelphian accouterments (mustard, cheese, etc).
Thankfully, it also came with instructions on how to make the cheesesteaks edible without burning the house down.
"Basically, the FedEx guy dropped off a Styrofoam cooler with everything in it and some sort of dry ice pack to keep everything cool. You unwrap the steaks, apply the cheese, wrap 'em back up, and throw 'em in the oven for 20 minutes," Yacenda said. "They were great; really great, actually. Like, you can get steaks out here with the Amoroso's rolls and stuff, but you can also get some really sh***y cheesesteaks. These were way better. It felt like comfort food, really."
"It took every last ounce of that incredible cheesesteak to fill the hole of sadness that the Eagles' defense has created in my soul," Wexler added.
McCabe could not immediately be reached for comment because Los Angeles has changed him and he likes to pretend that he's too important for everyone back on the East Coast, now. Eventually, McCabe got around to getting back to us saying, "The food was pretty awesome and kind of hilarious."
"Honestly, the package looked like one of those white boxes they ship organs in. I half expected to see a heart on ice when we opened it. Someone waiting for a transplant would have been screwed," he added.
"Also, I recommend putting the cheese on the steak before putting it in the oven, rather than heating the cheese up seperately and applying after. It looked like Play-Doh before melting and, really, you want that to be all melted through the steak."
"It seems pricey, but, if you've got the money, you should totally do it," McCabe finished.