Jose Canseco says he had a threesome with Jim Carrey and 'jigawatted' in your mother

Jose Canseco—former Major League Baseball slugger, noted snitch, and attempted MMA fighter—is currently most notable when he's being an idiot on Twitter. Seriously, you wouldn't believe half of the crap that comes from his account.

But, for as utterly useless as Canseco has proven to be most of the time, he is—on occasion—unintentionally hilarious. On Thursday afternoon, Canseco—for whatever reason—decided to swing by Reddit for an AMA. The results were just as wonderful as we all had hoped. It should be noted that a lot of the stuff Canseco says is, ahem, outlandish. So, all of his responses should come handcuffed to an entire salt mine.

Um, a big fat "[sic]" throughout because Canseco is hardly literate for a man that's written a book.

On time travel: