World Series ticket prices so high, fans will abandon families, says ticket broker

The Red Sox haven't clinched a World Series at home since World War I, though you have to assume the delirious mobs tearing the city apart in 2004 and 2007 weren't discerning the location of where their championships had been won.

Still, though. It's a big deal. Boston has all that history, and things. How about that curse? That was crazy. Woooo. Also, beards.

So naturally, everybody wants to be there Wednesday night when the Red Sox potentially bring this whole thing to a close. And because being there is something everybody wants, it's going to cost them most of their checking accounts to be there.

A Boston-area ticket broker has some thoughts on this, given his occupation and geographic location. And he doesn't think the $900 bleacher seats are going to be good sells for excited parents trying to bring their kids to the game:

"I think a lot of people are going to buy single tickets," Holzman said. "They'll say, 'It's too much for the wife and kids, I'm just going to buy one for myself and be there.'"

So, too bad, children. I'm going out for, uh, some cigarettes. Or something less suspicious. I'm going to change the oil in the car! In the driveway. For four hours. Nobody come outside or call me or ask where I'm actually going when I finish this sentence.