Redskins' Niles Paul gets juiced up
Like pretty much everybody else on the planet, Washington Redskins tight end Niles Paul likes Capri Sun. Unlike pretty much everybody else on the planet, Washington Redskins WR Niles Paul is a really, really, really likes Capri Sun, more or less to the point of fanatical devotion.
During training camp, he loaded up on it and encouraged his Twitter followers to bring him more when he ran out of it. Some fans actually did.
When the Washington Post's Sarah Kogod asked Paul about his love for the sugary, tropical drink that comes in silver pouches that first must be punctured with an accompanying straw, Paul opened up about his obsession:
"It's what my parents always used to buy me when I was little," he said of his love of the drink. "At my house I have a refrigerator full of them."
He stocked up for camp, but there's one flavor that isn't camp worthy.
"I didn't get no Strawberry Kiwi's, though," he said. "I have a lot at the house and I didn't want to bring them to the room or up here [to practice] because they're gonna drink them all."
"They" would be his Redskins teammates and his camp roommate, DeJon Gomes.
Well, the story apparently got back to the bigwigs at Capri Sun. According to an update from Kogod, the beverage manufacturer shipped Paul a case of Strawberry Kiwi drink pouches with the straws removed so would-be poachers would be less likely to mooch. In an attached letter, the company said:
"We here at Capri Sun are very distressed to learn about the threat of juice-induced larceny committed against one of our drinkers," the letter read. "So we called in some of our most astute packaging engineers and developed a fail-safe method of protection, custom tailored for you."
In lieu of the tiny, plastic bendy straws that come with the drinks, Capri Sun sent the wide receiver a custom-made silver straw engraved with his name and number. The straw even came ensconced in a special, padded case.
More from Kogod:
As if on cue, teammate Markus White walked by and grabbed a couple of drinks from the box.
"Man, none of these have straws," he said, shaking his head and putting them back in the box before walking off.
"That's right," Paul said, admiring the effectiveness of his new juice security system. "That's how it's supposed to be."
Geez. It must be nice to be a professional athlete. Incidentally, I love Monster energy drinks. I go through at least a case a month. I prefer the Absolute Zero flavor (no carbs, no sugar). I'm just putting it out there in case any execs from Monster happen to see this.