Merriam Theater doubles your Aziz Ansari for the week

Aziz Ansari will be leaving the friendly, obese confines of Pawnee, Indiana and braving the flash and pizzazz of the big city when he comes to Philadelphia tomorrow night.

A second show has been added to the "Parks and Recreation" comedian's appearance at the Merriam Theater, meaning more tickets and a live taping for a future special. 

No word yet on Jean-Ralphio's involvement, but it's not like he shows up with much warning, anyhow.

HE'LL HAVE HIS DAY IN BETANCOURT

Another former Phillie has found a home, and this one was only not a Phillie for several days. Yuniesky Betancourt received a one-year, Major League deal from the Milwaukee Brewers. The team's fans have been through Yuni's unique brand of mostly ineffective hitting and fielding before in 2011, and were not eager to see him back on the roster, going so far as to assume that his signing was some sort of sick joke with no punchline or set-up.

Their response took the form of America's other pastime: soundless, repeating images from the internet, filed under the hashtag "#Yunireactiongifs" so that history may recall that they were at least an organized rebellion.

Reactions ranged from "annoyed" to "really, violently annoyed." It was fun while it lasted, until Brewers fans succumbed to the reality that Yuniesky Betancourt was probably going to make a start at shortstop for them at some point in 2013.

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN BROAD STREET DOESN'T FIGHT BACK

As recently as St. Patrick's Day, it was considered that the Flyers could mount an incredible turnaround, stunning their cackling enemies and having several folk heroes emerge from their lines. All that bad mojo from the season would give way to a basically impossible combination of timely skill and luck, and history would remember them as the Flyers team that never gave up.

Ten days later, the Flyers are in an even deeper last place hole than before. Every game is a "must-win." Most games are a "resounding loss."

Paul Holmgren is combing Minnesota for an answer on defense and Jakub Voracek is revolutionizing the game of hockey. But it seems like too little, too late, and in a season marred by a lock out, it feels like we were safer on the other side of the door.

No, perhaps it's time to remember the recent past, when the dramatic comeback-fantasy played out for real, instead of this year, when the Flyers have brutally answered the age-old question, "What if Broad Street didn't fight back?"

INTO THE FIRE

The Washington Post recently referred to Philadelphia as a "proud basketball town," which was as good a sign as any that baseball can go ahead and get started already. We're all proud of La Salle, but there's not a lot of pride in what the city's highest level of basketball does every night.

With spring training winding down, and then the on-deck series here in Philly, and then three games away in Atlanta, there are only ten short days until the Phillies are back, for real, in Citizens Bank Park. And you'll still get to watch them in Atlanta, and the on-deck series is enough to whet your appetite, so all you have to do is will yourself to sleep for the next few days and it'll all just fly by!

Crushing pressure is at an all-time high after the Philly sportscape has been through a year in which most of our experience can be appropriately backed by a Sarah McLachlan song and parodied as a PSPCA ad. But it's uplifting how bright the future looks for the Phillies if you don't think about it too hard. Also, try not to remember the past too well, either.

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