Monday, May 25, 2015

Chris Christie hates Phillies

Chris Christie hates Phillies


  • Some mentally detached person forced the question last night, "What if they called in a bomb threat, but nobody was home?".



  • Don’t worry, Aaron Hernandez is going to be just fine. Why, the NFLPA is on the phone right now to get him his $82,500 bonus for showing up to workouts prior to the “being arrested for murder” thing.
  • Nothing improves the mood of a couple of heavily sub-.500 ball teams than a surprise shower, as the Giants and Rockies learned last night. 
  • Ladies and gentlemen, the Pittsburgh Pirates have a postseason ticket policy.
  • Cody Asche will be Miguel Cabrera one day, reports Cody Asche.



  • Also he’s gritty and a gamer and old school and plays the game the right way and dirt on the uniform and scrappy scrappy scrappy.
  • Mariano Rivera has been honored in broken bat rocking chair and sand castle form already this season. What else could the league have left? Just Metallica, playing his entrance music live as he comes into a game.
  • Mark Sanchez and Tim Tebow aren't focusing on the future, guys. Which is obvious, since they're able to get out of bed in the morning.
  • Definitely, we need a Twelve Monkeys TV series to compete with the Reality Bites TV series and also the Rambo TV series, just in case we forget there were movies in other decades.
  • McDonalds is about to start offering chicken wings on their menu, from September through November. Just enough time to put together an undercover expose on what McDonalds chicken wings are really made out of.
  • Oh no, Chris Christie hates the Phillies. Though he did say Ruben Amaro was "awful."


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