My girlfriend just scored major points by ordering me a copy of the new parent favorite, "Go the [Expletive] to Sleep," a children's book for adults.
People in my office howled as we read aloud from the book by novelist Adam Mansbach, the father of a 3-year-old:
"The cats nestle close to their kittens,
The lambs have laid down with the sheep.
You're cozy and warm in your bed, my dear.
Please go the [expletive] to sleep."
With lovely illustrations from Ricardo Cortes, the book looks for all the world like hundreds of other sweetly drawn children's tomes, glowing with animals and dramatic skies and lovely kids. But the text is like nothing you've ever seen: Page after page contains a parent's plaintive, raging, pathetic and decidedly profane negotiation with his child to just stay in bed and sleep, already.
I don't use this language with my daughter (no child could sleep after hearing such a harangue), but I've thought it.
Mansbach captures the end-of-the-day frustration of getting a little one off to dreamland with such hilarious precision.
And I was happy to read that Fox 2000 will soon turn the book into a movie.
I recognize that this book will rankle a few sensitive souls. But I just know there's a nighttime army of worked-to-the-last-nerve dads and moms out there who would immediately connect with the core message.
I'm depressed that I didn't think of writing this myself. Go get this book.