Thursday, July 10, 2014
Inquirer Daily News

What makes Philadelphians Hot

Friday afternoon, I'm in Suburban Station, with a few minutes to kill, and I happen upon a crowd gathering with signs and sheet music. Turns out it's a performance of the Philadelphia Complaint Chorus, and for the next six or so minutes I got treated to a musical rendering of many things that are annoying about living in this city, including:

What makes Philadelphians Hot

I can't remember when waiting for SEPTA was so satisfying.

Friday afternoon, I'm in Suburban Station, with a few minutes to kill, and I happen upon a crowd gathering with signs and sheet music. Turns out it's a performance of the Philadelphia Complaint Choir, and for the next six or so minutes I get treated to a musical rendering of many annoying things about living in this city, including.

SEPTA.

New Jersey drivers.

Casinos next door.

Call centers.

Did we mention New Jersey drivers?

Over and over, with a poopy chorus.

Well, someone made a video of what I happened upon. My only complaint is that they didn't capture the street person who joined in toward the end, and deserves a solo at the next and last time this is performed, which will be at the Painted Bride, Wednesday at 6 p.m.

UPDATE: There's been a call from the comments section for lyrics. Shelley Spector of the choir project sent this along, the working lyrics from a few weeks ago:

Philadelphia Complaint Choir

 
Music: Evan Solo
Lyric Coordination : Shelley Spector

The government does not believe in global warming
My unemployed roommate just smokes pot all day
The maintenance man will not take my phone calls
I wish I had time to complain.
 
 
The parking signs in the city confuse me
I hate men who make comments on m hairy legs
Horse and buggies hold up traffic
I wish I had time to complain.
 
Please listen carefully as or menu options have changed
Your call is very important to us
 
I hate my job,
Nobody listens to me
 
D-O-G P-O-O-P
Pop-poo-py Poo-py
 
When the third floor toilet overflows
it rains in my office
When the second floor toilet overflows
it rains in my kitchen
 
They want to build casinos right next to our houses
The wind blew my umbrella inside out
Half the Sunday paper is advertising trash
I have gas
 
Please listen carefully as or menu options have changed
Your call is very important to us
 
New Jersey drivers, can’t drive or park
I hate my job,
Nobody listens to me
 
D-O-G P-O-O-P
Pop-poo-py Poo-py
 
 
Why, Why, Why
Why can’t we vote for the people who write the campaign speeches?
Why, Why, Why
Why isn’t it raining? It was supposed to rain
Why, Why, Why
Why is the cost of college tuition so high?
Why Why Why
Why can’t I get sex more than ev’ry for months?
 
New Jersey drivers, can’t drive or park
I hate my job,
Nobody listens to me
 
D-O-G P-O-O-P
Pop-poo-py Poo-py
 
A          Due to unusually high call volume our operators are busy assisting other customers
Your call will be answered in the order it was received
 
B          Please listen carefully as or menu options have changed
Your call is very important to us
 
New Jersey drivers, can’t drive or park
I hate my job,
Nobody listens to me
 
D-O-G P-O-O-P
SEPTA sucks!
 
New Jersey drivers, can’t drive or park
I hate my job,
Nobody listens to me
 
New Jersey drivers, can’t drive or park
I hate my job,
Nobody listens to me
 
D - O - G   P - O - O - P

About this blog
Daniel Rubin is a columnist and The Inquirer's director of social media. Since joining newspaper as a staff writer in 1988, Daniel Rubin has reported from Mayfair to Macedonia, 27 countries in all. He has been the European Correspondent for Knight Ridder Newspapers and for two years he sat at home and wrote Blinq, the paper's first daily blog. Dan began newspaper work in Norfolk and Louisville, Ky., after getting his undergraduate and graduate degrees from Northwestern University. He has lived in all four commonwealths, most recently in Pennsylvania. He teaches urban journalism at the University of Pennsylvania

Email Blinq here. My day job - Inquirer metro columnist - is here.

Reach Daniel at drubin@phillynews.com.

Metro Mashup
Also on Philly.com
Stay Connected