Pray he's on the phone.
I don't understand how you can conduct business when you are, well, conducting business. It just seems wrong. Especially when you are in a public restroom, and the person next door is a captive audience for an intimate scene in your life. Do you have to share so generously?
"I hope you're on the phone," I said after he followed his "I Love You" with something about the groceries. Clearly I was intruding on his world, which was only fair.
"Yes," he replied after a second's pause. "Why?"
I looked down. Black loafers. Shined. Clearly not from the newsroom.
"Because I was hoping you were talking to someone else."
"Because I was hoping you weren't talking to me."
Suddenly, he wasn't so talkative.