The normally staid Centers for Disease Control is helping the masses preparing for the Rapture, coming Saturday in case you didn't know, which is potentially putting a damper on your summer plans.
Yes, the CDC has compiled Preparedness 101: Zombie Apocalypse which is obviously, given the lowly number, a beginning course. Or, as a zombie might put it, a gut class.
Your federal tax dollars are hard at work, folks.
Among the CDC's suggestions: stock plenty of water, bleach (good for the blood problem) and, of course, duct tape, necessary in all international and inter-species emergencies.
"If zombies did start roaming the streets, CDC would conduct an investigation much like any other disease outbreak," the site advises.
The Rapture is supposed to hit around 6 p.m. Saturday, an hour before the Phils scheduled game against the Rockies. We should get back to writing our Sunday column but then again....