Thursday, September 3, 2015

A chicken's political motivations

An online, from left and right, look at why the chicken crossed the road.

A chicken's political motivations


Okay, let's agree that those ubiquitous emailed jokes and barbs about politicians generally aren't worth the time it takes to hit delete.

But there's one flying around the Internet now that might make you smile.

It's titled "Why did the chicken cross the road?" and it includes answers from the left and right, sort of like, you know, looking both ways.

Let me poach a few examples:

Sarah Palin: The chicken crossed the road because, gosh-darn it, he's a maverick.

Barack Obama: Let me be perfectly clear, if the chickens like their eggs they can keep their eggs. No chicken will be required to cross the road to surrender her eggs. Period.

Hillary Clinton: What difference does it make at this point why the chicken crossed the road?

George W. Bush: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or against us. There is no middle ground here.

Bill Clinton: I did not cross the road with that chicken.

Dick Cheney: Where's my gun?

Al Gore: I invented the chicken.

Pat Buchanan: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

Al Sharpton: Why are all the chickens white?

And to localize the theme, allow me:

Tom Corbett: To find more jobs, less taxes.

Tom Wolf: To get a fresh start.

Perhaps you can scramble your brain to come up with others. Just don't, you know, lay an egg.


Daily News Political Columnist
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About this blog
John Baer has been covering politics and government for the Daily News since 1987. The National Journal in 2002 called Baer one of the country's top 10 political journalists outside Washington, saying Baer has, "the ability to take the skin off a politician without making it hurt too much." E-mail John at

John is the author of the book "On The Front Lines of Pennsylvania Politics: Twenty-Five Years of Keystone Reporting" (The History Press, 2012). Reach John at

John Baer Daily News Political Columnist
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