Archive: August, 2012
As the daughter of a onetime soldier, I can’t stand it when civilians (like me) use the metaphors of ‘war’ to explain differences of opinion. It is both disrespectful to the people who sacrificed a great deal for this country on bases and battlefields, and gives undeserved weight to what are nothing more than artificial controversies.
Take, for example, the so-called war on women. As we’ve seen over the past few weeks, some people have an innate ability to shoot from the mouth, sending the bullet directly into their own feet. Todd Akin is one of these not-so-sharpshooters. His now-legendary comment that women cannot get pregnant as the result of rape has been widely discredited, and he will probably lose his Senate race to stupidity, not to McCaskill. Conservatives want him to disappear. Liberals, on the other hand, are thrilled with this gift that keeps on giving, because they’ve been able to parlay his unfortunate choice of words into a battle cry of “Save the Women!” It’s as if we were under enemy fire and President Obama is the only one who could protect us against the evil impregnators of the world.
Democrats are going to play up this perceived gender gap issue by making Sandra ‘I’m a little short on cash this month’ Fluke as a featured speaker at their own convention next month. The Georgetown law student is a foot soldier in the battle for what some have call ‘reproductive rights’ and others call hyperbole. I hate to break it to the bellicose libs, but there is no war on my gender. In fact, the only people who make me feel as if I’m under assault are other women who persist in saying, as one recently did, that I only care about this ‘tiny little cell of life’ over the welfare of a ravaged rape victim.
Right next to that battlefield is the one where the starving and tattered hordes that make up the 99% are marching, barefoot and with pitchforks, toward the castle of Romney the Rich. The Class War started when the Occupiers put away their soap and picked up their bullhorns, decrying the duplicity of the Wall Street crowd. Then, as it became clear that Wall Street wasn’t a big enough target, they transferred their hatred to the fiscal conservatives like Paul Ryan who want to take granny hostage as a spoil of war and think that the Middle Class should live as they did in the Middle Ages. As a nice rhetorical flourish, we have President Obama (the man gets around) telling the angry crowds that those rich people holed up in the castle didn’t build anything they owned, including that solid-gold drawbridge separating them from the proletariat.
And then we have a booby-trapped minefield just south of there, where the Race War is taking shape quicker than Hurricane Issac. One of the hottest battlegrounds in this war is our own fair state of Pennsylvania where, according to the valiant protectors of the unidentifiable, Keystone Republicans want to disenfranchise ‘certain’ voters. Those ‘certain’ voters happen to be, surprise, surprise, primarily of the Democratic persuasion according to these warriors. Additionally, they happen to be teetering on the edge of their deathbeds. But even more than this, most of them happen to be minorities. And when we say minority, of course we mean Black. So let’s recap: Voter ID is a nefarious plan by slimy conservatives to wrest an election landslide from the first post-racial President. It is a throwback to the Mississippi of the 1960s where people were murdered simply for trying to exercise their right to vote. It is a way to keep some people shackled, in chains (or so I hear from a reliable source.) It is a way to allow the wealthy and the privileged and the white and the male to strengthen their chokehold on this wonderful country of ours. It is, in short, a way to roll back all of the progress achieved through the Civil Rights movement.
Women. Ninety-Niners. African-Americans. Senior Citizens. And whatever pops up on the Western Front. I’m exhausted.
Now might be a good time to check out the Quakers.
Ann Romney did what she needed to do on Tuesday night. She stood there, a warm and smiling blonde trailing sunshine, and wowed the crowd.
Unlike Sarah Palin, who arrived like an Alaskan Amazon and aimed sharp arrows at unseen opponents, Ann was gentle.
Unlike Cindy McCain who was an icy mannequin in the mold of a Hitchcock heroine, she melted hearts.
I find it laughable that Penn State has decided to ditch “Sweet Caroline” as one of the songs that are played when the revamped and revolutionized football team takes the field. While C. Delores Tucker and Tipper Gore were actually right to be upset about lurid lyrics back in the 90s, this takes political correctness to a whole new level. Apparently, in the wake of the Sandusky scandal, we must purge anything that even vaguely reminds us that human beings are contact animals (even when we are at a football game.) The offensive lines in “Sweet Caroline” are, presumably, these:
Well good golly, Miss Molly, the New York Times has a problem with social conservatives. Who’d a thunk it.
Actually, they’ve always had a problem with those of us who stray to the right of that bright line of ‘reason,’ the one that says women must be reduced to their common element: the desire to fill or empty their wombs according to their (and only their) desires.
Because, you know, that is the defining characteristic of an intelligent woman, according to the scribes at the Times and all the other newspapers that think they have a patent on rational thought. And according to the Gray Lady’s editorial page, Paul Ryan is among the idiots.
As I’ve written before, I’m no big fan of Newsweek. They have a history of doing hatchet jobs on conservatives, putting female politicians on the cover and making them look like porn stars (as in Sarah Palin) or straight-jacketed psychos (as in Michelle Bachman.) They’ve put halos on Obama when he supports gay marriage, from which we can infer that only the satanic oppose Adam and Steve. And they called Mitt Romney a wimp (that was before he made the rather daring choice of Paul Ryan for a running mate.)
In other words, Newsweek is nowhere near a bastion of journalistic excellence, in my humble opinion.
However, I had to smile a little this week when my mailman handed me a copy of the current issue. There, on the cover, was a flattering photo of Barack Obama with the caption “Hit the Road, Barack.” The cover story by Harvard history professor Niall Ferguson draws a negative picture of our Commander in Chief, particularly with respect to the Affordable Care Act and the damage it’s likely to do to the economy.
Yesterday, my office looked a little bit like what I would imagine Ellis Island resembled in the early 1900s, when immigrants from all over the world flocked to these shores for the proverbial ‘better life.’ President Obama’s new initiative allowing people who came here as children to obtain working papers and some minimal protection from deportation finally went into effect, and the reaction was overwhelming.
I know that many of my friends on the right have no sympathy for someone who jumped the border or overstayed his or her welcome, even if that someone was an infant at the time of entry. I understand that there is a sharp difference of opinion as to who deserves to be here, and who doesn’t. And I refuse to pull out the ‘racist’ card that liberals throw around because their analytical skills have atrophied.
But if you could have seen the people in my office yesterday, you might understand why it’s important to welcome these young people instead of keeping them in the shadows. None of them had foreign accents when they spoke. Not a one looked any different from the teens and young adults on the streets of Philadelphia (which may not be a good thing, but I digress…) They were all in school, all planning to go to college, all loyal to the only country they’d ever known.
When I awoke this morning to find that Mitt Romney had picked Paul Ryan (or as I call him, Paulie Blue Eyes) to be his running mate, I was beyond elated. For the first time since he became the presumptive Republican nominee, I felt that the ex-Governor of Massachussets had finally executed a move that would have gotten a 10.00 from the Bulgarian judges. To continue the Olympic theme, I realized that I hadn't felt this excited about a contest since the US hockey team beat Russia in 1980 (and no, I'm not calling anyone a communist....)
All joking aside, Ryan was a fantastic pick. He's brilliant, a visionary, articulate, young, and charismatic. He has all of the qualities that you want in the heir apparent, plus he isn't in danger of outshining the guy in the top position. Chris Christie, much as I love him, would have been too Jersey Strong for the blander Romney, and would have moved the narrative in a different and not altogether productive direction.
Ryan is all about fixing this broken economy, getting rid of waste, cutting entitlements, and making sure that there will be an economy for our children and our grandchildren. The other side is moving us toward a scenario where we'll be engaging in 5 Year Plans, music of Dr. Zhivago playing in the background (okay, maybe I am conjuring the comrades.)