Sunday, October 4, 2015

For Bravo, suicide is shameless

If this is reality, I wanna be fake

For Bravo, suicide is shameless

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The grieving widow

Of course you knew they weren’t going to neuter the golden goose.

Anyone who really thought that Bravo (Acronym for “Boobs, Rubes And Vile Ooze”) television would cancel the upcoming season of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, or that Andy Cohen and his band of whores care about dignity and compassion are, with all due respect, idiots.

Remember, friends, they bow at the altar of Neilsen.

So I had no doubt at all that we would soon be seeing the bleached, botoxed, bloated-lip “beauties” of  California on our home screens come Labor Day.

There had been talk about shelving the show after one of the ladies’ husbands committed suicide last month.  I’m not sure whether it was because the network felt guilty, or that it couldn’t edit out the attacks on the poor man in time for the season operner.  After all, it was no secret that they were going to make him look like a West Coast version of Joey Buttafuoco, only without the muscles and tats (I mean, they already have “Real Housewives of New Jersey.”)

But I knew they’d make every effort to exploit the man’s suicide by pretending not to.  There’s already news that they’re going to include “suicide prevention” public service announcements in the show, along with appropriately somber interviews with other cast members (not the grieving widow, of course, the one who filed for divorce and basically called the man an abuser on-air.)

I frankly don’t know if Mr. Beverly Hills was a lout.  There’s evidence that he had problems in prior relationships, and couldn’t handle money.  And honestly, if you allow yourself to be trailed by a film crew when you're brushing your teeth, balancing your checkbook and doing Number One, you have to expect some havoc in your life.

But I’m sure the gent wouldn’t be too happy to know that the show that essentially destroyed his life and marriage is now going to hit a ratings payday with his suicide.

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See Christine Flowers on Channel 6's "Inside Story" Sunday at 11:30 a.m.

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