Steve Martin's unsolicited advice to Eddie Murphy

Once upon a time, in 1999 it was, Steve Martin and Eddie Murphy co-starred in Bowfinger, a very meta, very funny, and very forgotten spoof of the movie industry. Today Martin, the drollest Oscar host of the past 20 years, sent a letter  to his onetime co-star advising him how to host the upcoming Oscars. (Hat tip, Anne Thompson).

In this playful missive, Martin advises the manorexic Murphy to slim down before the Oscar ceremony because Murphy looked a little paunchy in Norbit.

What would you add to Martin's pointers?

In the spirit of Amy Poehler and Melissa McCarthy who tweaked the television academy at this week's Emmys by delivering a "It's been a good year for men on TV" speech (a gender-reversed version of the patronizing "it's been a good year for women" moment), Murphy should do a sketch that's a race-reversed version of The Help.

Your ideas?