Howard Stern's dubious 'Talent'
The king of all media bows as a reality show judge
Howard Stern’s dubious ‘Talent’
David Hiltbrand, Inquirer TV Writer
America’s Got Talent certainly gave it a monumental buildup. The NBC summer series kicked off its seventh season last night with a helicopter shot of host Nick Cannon standing atop a pinnacle, screaming “Are you ready for the revolution? Howard Stern!”
Then there was a long video montage of various talking heads all obsessing about Howard’s new gig, set curiously to the strains of the Rolling Stones’ “Sympathy for the Devil”.
So how could Stern’s first night on the judging panel of AGT be anything but anticlimactic?
At least Howard brought energy to the gig. And say this for him, he was quick on the buzzer. But then faced with this cavalcade of clownishness, who wouldn’t have been? Maybe Hasselhof.
As much as the show wanted to surround Howard with interesting acts on his first program, taped at auditions in Los Angeles and St. Louis, the auditioners didn’t cooperate. In the end, you simply can’t escape the fact that Stern is hosting a cheesy talent show, one in which clown time prevails over art by a factor of about 25 to 1.
And the sad fact is that plunged into this gong show gulag, the judges themselves end up not being able to tell the absolute dreck from the semi-interesting. They sent through a guy whose entire act was to drop a scorpion in his mouth. Encore!
For the first time in a long, daring career, Stern, pop’s junkyard dog, is acting like a lap dog. And he’s gone obediently mainstream for money. An astonishing, obscene amount of money. But still.
Did you ever think you’d hear Howard Stern uttering patriotic platitudes like, “You’re everything that makes America great”? He’s swallowed his trademark caustic sense of humor for good natured ribbing. You could swear at times on Monday night (“I had almost given up hope. I spent a lot of time listening to nudniks.”) that Howard was trying to sound like his father.
Prime time Stern. You asked for it. You paid for it. You got it.
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I am a big fan of Stern but these types of shows are horrid. I watched the premiere last night and figured out in a matter of minutes why I avoided these types of programs in the first place. I love listening to Howard everyday but Im not sure about this show even though I think he did a good job, its just too girly of a show really and feels like a live action Glee. How many dance groups can be put through? No one will go to see those acts in Vegas and the guy who put a scorpion in his mouth was insane but not really full of talent. The guy who made the instrument using the theatre was good though. I will give it some more time because its Stern but I wont superceed watching Baseball and the NHL playoffs for it again.— Bob Sacamano- Howard "Jumped the Shark" years ago. — Timmy Huey
- Howard is the single most under-rated entertainer of his generation. No entertainer has had such a loyal following for so long...and across such a wide range of outlets.
Now, let's get Romeo Blues (AKA Eric the Midget) on the show and see what talent that little angry, deflated volleyball has to display!— kelprod2 - As usual, kelprod2 using the splatter method. Just throw s*** against the wall to see what sticks. Stern under-rated? He's just a kid that never grew up. And isn't it about time he changed the hair? Seems the styles have changed in the 25 years since he's had that one. Is he a Ramone wannabe?
- "Shut Up! Sit Down!"— sillybilly
- "I told you not to be stupid, you moron"— EaglesPhilliesIrish
- fa fa flo hi— box297
- George says..."ooooh my"— kelprod2
- Newsflash to the mainstream media: it's not 1997. Stern's acted has mellowed (I've listened pretty much every day since '94) a LOT and especially in the last several years. Call it selling out if you want, but he's grown as a person and what you saw last night is closer to the reality of Stern than the public perception. He does the occasional dirty bits on Sirius (strippers, gross out contests, etc) but his heart doesn't seem into it like the old days. Which is fine. People change. Howard Stern is the man, what don't you understand?— Tacklebury
- I saw this show the first time around. It was called "The Gong Show". Didn't like it then, don't like it now.— Nova
- Stern took the $$$$ and went to Sirius but he misses the national limelight. The adoration of the a**holes who pay a monthly fee to listen to him is not enough. If he were a contestant on this show he would be buzzed off as he has no talent except for his potty mouth.— Joe Pyne
- So, the guy complaining about Stern's "potty mouth" manages to curse twice in two sentences. You sir, have zero credibility. — Tacklebury
- To ALL the idiots out there who said it was a mistake... And to Howard "O GOOD FOR YEEEEWWWWW"— elfman
- Huge Stern Fan since WYSP but this was a sellout move for the money. Hope he bags it after this season. He's got a couple years left of Sirius and that'll be it. Great career but all good things must come to an end.— friedmozzarela
- I am a Stern fan, but I wish all these talent shows, dancing shows and singing shows would die a horrible death and go away. Please include the 1 guy and 25 women (the reverse ones too.) dating shows that are looking for true life long love in 6 weeks.
Spare us the agony!— Wildman Bill
