Caller foils pathetic attempt to burglarize Family Dollar
Who needs to rob a bank with a gun when you can knock off a dollar store with a trash can lid? William O. Green, 45, of Chester, has been arrested after a bold, yet pitiful, attempt to burglarize the Family Dollar in New Castle.
Caller foils pathetic attempt to burglarize Family Dollar
Why rob a bank with a gun when you can knock off a dollar store with a trash can lid?
Delaware State Police say William O. Green, 45, of Chester, Pa., was arrested last night after a bold, yet pitiful, attempt to burglarize the Family Dollar in New Castle.
Green, apparently some kind of master of low expectations, meatheaded his way into the dollar store by throwing a metal trash can lid through the front window, police said. He was promptly arrested, before he even got into the store, when a passerby called 911. He was armed with a 6-inch folding knife, cops say.
If anyone has $36,500, you can bail Green out of the Howard R. Young Correctional Institute. Or you can go to Family Dollar and buy 36,500 items.
I win. Thank you, rizbik.
Mr, Bender,
Actually, you didn't fix any typos.
You corrected improper use of synonyms.
A typo is a misprint.
— 1000hugs- you mean homophones not synonyms...nice try though — rizbik
- William Bender is cool. Thanks for an entertaining read.— Breaking Bad
- hi first degree ...do you really want to engage in a discussion about the typical ratio of crimes and victims and their physical characteristics...it's a little one-sided in philly dont you think. but i dont mean any harm to good natured citizens....as in all crimes, its best that the appropriate perpetrator is caught. sincerely twitter.com/dannyozark— danny ozark
- This is funny dude and I appreciate the humor. @ First Degree, If this guy turns out to be the same braintrust who attempted a robbery in Harrisburg, he held a knife to the clerk's throat and beat her unconscious when she fought back so he needs to go down for more serious offenses.— kwhelm
- Does Barry Manilow know you raid his wardrobe? You'll get the answer to that question, Mr. Bender, next Saturday. Don't mess with the bull, you'll get the horns.
- I'll drink to that, Tonner. Genny Cream Ale? — William Bender
- But of course Mr. Bender. Is there any other beer? BTW, does William have a brother named John?
- Now that the grammar has been cleaned up, seriously, a 45 year old attempting to rob a dollar store? A DOLLAR store? This guy should be jailed for stupidity.— aviator
- the reason he robbed the family dollar instead of a bank is that people like him are in love with dollar stores to the point of addiction...they love spending their money on schlock. sincerely twitter.com/dannyozark— danny ozark
- This idiot needs to be made to work in that same store for an entire for 12 hours a day cleaning toilets and sweeping and mopping floors for free,and then be placed in jail for 36,500 days afterwards,to learn his lesson.He should have called the darn cops on himself,seriously.— knicknasty
- Chill people, I fixed the typo! Damn ...
- Thin skin. Chill. Another clarification. Family Dollar has other items that do not cost one dollar. It's not the classic dollar store. In days of old there was the "5 and 10". They were so popular that they outlived the days when every item sold for either 5 cents or 10 cents and everybody just called them the five and ten. Stores like Woolworth, Kresge's, McCrory's, and W.T. Grant's. Therefore, there are dollar stores where everything sells for a dollar and stores like Dollar General and Family Dollar that have different price points. A good reporter would not have made that simple mistake. — Genders
- Typo's aside, honesty sometimes is its best in a fit of rage writing. It's not a big deal, the message came across. The editor should be proud that someone has balls on their team. Typos can be fixed.— Krackass
- "threw" the front window???? Really??? This is still the website of a major newspaper in the 5th largest city in the country? Right?!— bluehaha
- Trashcan lid "THREW" the front window? And "BY" 36,500 items? As hard as it it to believe, you people get more pitiful and amatuer by the day.— TomM
- There's a different between threw and through. Please double check your grammar. The editor should be put to shame here ...— drjk888
- Aside from the typo at the end I like the bluntness of the article— ConverseB24
- 1. Best article I have ever read. Brutal honesty goes a long way! 2. There is a typo in the last paragraph. It should say "buy" not "by" 3. Thank you again for this, I am reading it again because I agree with it 110%— Krackass
- Soem guy tried to rob the Family Dollar in Harrisburg Saturday. I bet it's the same loser.— kwhelm
