Cops: Man caught naked and masturbating along I-95

From the stupid criminal files at the Daily News, here's one from back in May to brighten your  Monday.

There are certain things you should not do along the side of a major interstate. Masturbating is probably one of them.

On May 18, Steven Hecksher, 23, of Essington, was found by patrol officers behind a sound barrier along 1-95 in Tinicum Township “completely naked” and “masturbating,” according to a state police press release.

When Hecksher spotted the troopers he ran away but soon realized he’d forgotten something very important – his clothes ­– and he went back to get them, police said.

Hecksher was arrested and charged with open lewdness and disorderly conduct.

The kicker is that it wasn’t the dark of night when Hecksher allegedly stripped bare and grabbed his own stick shift along 1-95. It was 5:40 p.m.

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