Saturday, April 18, 2015

'Celebrity Apprentice': Don't cry for me Venezuela

Patricia Velasquez loses a bitter boardroom struggle

'Celebrity Apprentice': Don’t cry for me Venezuela

Debbie Gibson consoles Aubrey O´Day
Debbie Gibson consoles Aubrey O'Day

 

You do not want to go false eyelash to false eyelash with Aubrey O’Day. The woman got her reality show martial arts training in the P Diddy dojo on MTV’s Making the Band. Did you see how she wept buckets of tears last night in the boardroom confrontation on Celebrity Apprentice without smearing a molecule of her makeup? She’s a stone cold killer.

Although she was the Project Manager on the losing women’s team, she still managed to shift the blame elsewhere and get Patricia Velasquez fired.

The challenge was to create a promotional campaign for Crystal Light, the lo-cal powdered beverage mix. The men, commanded by Clay Aiken, went with a beach bar theme which I thought was a bold choice for a non-alcoholic potion. Welcome to virgin margaritaville. Don’t forget to tip Dee Snider.

The women never stood a chance. When will they learn? No one wants to hear Debbie Gibson sing! No one.

Celeb Apprentice tradition would dictate that the project manager go down with her ship. But O’Day was having none of that. Her suggestion: let’s get rid of everyone with foreign accents. O’Day insisted again and again to the Trumps that she was the real idea generator on the women’s team, having come up with the concept time after time. To which Dayana Mendoza, who seems to be on the chopping block every Sunday, slyly pointed out: Yeah, and we keep losing every week.

Then Ivanka threw Aubrey a rope. The Crystal Light people had liked the promotional concept. It was the graphics they disapproved of. Aubrey who had vehemently been claiming that she controlled every aspect of the challenge, stopped in mid-sentence. Every aspect, that is, except graphics, which was ALL Patricia.

Before Velasquez could get a foreign accented word in sideways, Trump made his call (see video below).

 

As Velasquez took the elevator ride from which no one returns, the Donald marveled at how the women can tear each other apart at the table and then hug one another on the way out of the room. Yes, because it’s not like they were in contrived circumstances in which you were pitting them against one another.

Next week, we travel to crazytown as the genders get mixed and the behavior gets really out of hand. I kind of wish Trump could fire most of this pack at once, because frankly, these people are starting to scare me. I’m looking at you, Arsenio.

 

 

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Inquirer TV Critic
About this blog

A true child of TV, David Hiltbrand has worked as a critic at People and as a columnist and editor at TV Guide.

David Hiltbrand Inquirer TV Critic
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