Goldman Sachs is who we thought they were

It turns out that Goldman Sachs is what Steve Martin used to call "a profit deal." Who knew? OK, everyone knew -- but it's still kind of cool to see "the vampire squid" taken down from the inside:

What are three quick ways to become a leader? a) Execute on the firm's "axes," which is Goldman-speak for persuading your clients to invest in the stocks or other products that we are trying to get rid of because they are not seen as having a lot of potential profit. b) "Hunt Elephants." In English: get your clients — some of whom are sophisticated, and some of whom aren't — to trade whatever will bring the biggest profit to Goldman. Call me old-fashioned, but I don't like selling my clients a product that is wrong for them. c) Find yourself sitting in a seat where your job is to trade any illiquid, opaque product with a three-letter acronym.

Today, many of these leaders display a Goldman Sachs culture quotient of exactly zero percent. I attend derivatives sales meetings where not one single minute is spent asking questions about how we can help clients. It's purely about how we can make the most possible money off of them. If you were an alien from Mars and sat in on one of these meetings, you would believe that a client's success or progress was not part of the thought process at all.

It makes me ill how callously people talk about ripping their clients off. Over the last 12 months I have seen five different managing directors refer to their own clients as "muppets," sometimes over internal e-mail.

Yes, Greg Smith (if that indeed is your real name), you are old fashioned. This is not an abberation -- it's the "post-industrial" American economy at work. At least I see the treatment for the next sequel of the Muppet Movie series.

There's lot's of good take-offs, etc., on the Web, but it's hard to top Andy Borowitz.

Also, the so-called liberal media is trying to destroy Greg Smith -- there's a surprise.