Big news that I missed while I was away

I know all of you have been waiting to hear from me on this major development, which will have a big impact on American sociery going forward...Bill Gates is now on Twitter! Actually, what's fascinating are that his first two exchanges have been (and I'm not making this up) with Ryan Seacrest and Ashton Kutcher -- more proof that the world's occasionally richest man is just as lame and celebrity-addled as the rest of us. No wonder President Obama is praying.

Doesn't seem like anything else happened.

Just kidding...come back tonight.