UPDATED: Barack Obama commands the Dow to rise

Move over, Jim Cramer. There's a new stock picker in town, and his name is Barack Obama:


WASHINGTON - A bullish President Obama says the ever-sinking Dow hasn't gotten him down - in fact, this might be a smart time to buy into the stock market.

What you're now seeing is profit-and-earning ratios are starting to get to the point where buying stocks is a potentially good deal if you've got a long-term perspective on it," Obama said Tuesday.
U.S. stocks broke a five-day losing streak Wednesday, as shares rose around the world, oil and metal prices rallied and Treasuries fell...
Amazon.com Inc. shares skyrocketed more than 19% yesterday after President Barack Obama upgraded his one-year target price on the company's stock to $400.
OK, OK, actually that last item is really a slightly altered news story from 1998. But you have to wonder if Obama is angling for a job at CNBC when this whole president thing is over. Maybe he and Rick Santelli could host a show together
UPDATE: Speaking of stock pickers, "The Daily Show" ripped CNBC to shreds last night in a devastating piece that shows once again why more Americans get their news from Jon Stewart than any other source. Watch it below, and Mark Karlin has more to say about this.
Unfortunately, it looks like President Obama's record as a stock picker is starting to resemble Cramer's.