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Questions that should have been
For a coach of a 2-0 team, Mike Tomlin sure was testy Tuesday. Angry that a TV talking head had described QB Ben Roethlisberger's sprained shoulder as separated - oh, the incompetence! - the Steelers coach went on a mini-tirade.
What if, a Niffle staffer wondered, we turned Tomlin's meltdown into something like those beer commercials in which "funny" fake questions are inserted before a coach's actual answers? It might go something like this:
Fake question: Coach Tomlin, did you drop this report as you walked by? It's titled, "Distract the Media by Making a Big Deal Out of Nothing."
Real answer: "I have no idea where that report came from."
Fake question: Coach, do you know how these laxatives got into the media room water cooler?
Real answer: "It didn't come from me or my medical staff."
Fake question: Coach, what should we do with these racy photos of the team cheerleaders somebody e-mailed to Channel 99?
Real answer: "If anybody in here has got any information about where that report came from, send them to me."
Don't worry, we fired the staffer who wrote this.
Contact staff writer Gary Miles at 215-854-4487 or gmiles@phillynews.com.
On the flip side
Meanwhile, at the tail end of the victory parade, the 0-2 Lions are getting restless in Detroit. As if it isn't bad enough that Jon Kitna is still their QB and Matt Millen is still team president - how does that happen? - the players are pointing some pretty long fingers at the bosses. Unhappy with the offense, receiver Roy Williams, he of six catches for 95 yards and one touchdown in the two losses, suggested that soon-to-be-former coach Rod Marinelli go back to a more wide-open offense, one that - here comes the shocker - features MORE PASSING. Then, as if realizing what he had said, Williams added, "But I'm just a player." Not for very much longer, RW, if you keep yapping like that.Contact staff writer Gary Miles at 215-854-4487 or gmiles@phillynews.com.
