Louis Alberta has a holiday tradition, and it doesn't involve shopping, gifts or must-attend gatherings. On Christmas he packs up a suitcase and flies overseas, even though the rest of his family is Stateside.

"In Europe, it's so much different. It's subtle, more about the holiday and not the packages and piles of pictures," said Alberta, who owns Bauhaus Gallery, a hair salon in Collingswood. "It's simple and it's sweet and it's nice - no blow-up stuff from Lowe's on everyone's lawn."

This year Alberta, 38, is flying to Paris to visit his cousin. Previous Christmas trips have taken him to Amsterdam and the Caribbean.

Skipping the family holiday rigmarole and heading somewhere exotic might seem like a fantasy or the stuff of movies (Four Christmases, which hit theaters last week, is about a traveling couple stuck at home), but going away for the holidays is becoming a more accepted and even sought-out option, not just for those seeking warmth in December but also for those looking for an escape from mounting commercialism and a break from old traditions.

"There's a tremendous pressure that's put on us commercially and by religion and by advertising that of course it will be happy, and of course you will all be there singing around the piano and everything will be wonderful and better if you buy a lot," said Annie Stanfield-Hagert, a Philadelphia counselor and social worker. "It's a dream. But then someone gets stuck in the New Jersey Turnpike and the kid throws up on your couch."

Tack on travel and time in cramped quarters in a guest room or couch, and you can have a holiday of hurt rather than warm, fuzzy memories.

Plus, the holidays can be especially painful for adults with tainted childhood memories. Having relatives who drank too much and made scenes during family gatherings meant their expectations were never met as children and probably aren't met now. The solution: Stay away from the source of pain and make a run for it.

"If those expectations are going to interfere with enjoying a holiday with your children or your new boyfriend or on your own, oftentimes it's not better to return to a place loaded with resentment and anger," Stanfield-Hagert said.

Joshua Bush, vice president of Park Avenue Travel, a travel agency in Swarthmore, said he is seeing more families travel during this time of year. And despite the current economic slowdown, plans haven't let up, in part because most of those plans were made and paid for in the summer, he said. "We'll book lots of connecting rooms or one big suite, and [families] look for hotels that can cater to themes as far as having a special Thanksiving or holiday meal."

In the case of the Hansen family, the Cherry Hill foursome planned their trip to a time share in Tahoe months ago. They take a ski trip every year, but this was the first time they decided to go during Christmas. In fact, their plane leaves Christmas Day.

"So much work goes into the holidays. We've always thought about going away but never had done it," said Alice Hansen, 46, a saleswoman for VCT, a plastic card-making company. Husband Rick, 51, is a postal worker in Haddonfield. When looking at possible ski-trip dates, the break between Christmas and New Year's made sense because they found it difficult to pull their children, Kevin, 16, and Erica, 14, out of high school during non-holiday times.

Of course, the change in plans didn't come without consequences. Alice Hansen's mother isn't exactly happy that the family will be away and flying on a religious holiday. To compromise, they're attending Christmas Eve Mass and having a family party the Sunday before.

"Does that make my guilt better? No," Hansen admitted. "I do have apprehensions about not being home for the holiday and that it will be different for the kids."

Alberta faced that same resistance from his parents in South Carolina when he first announced in 2000 that he would be traveling for Christmas. "They were a little disappointed, but being that I'm going to see my cousin, they understood," he said. "My father understands starting new traditions."

Some people skip town with extended family included. Lisa Simon's family took a cruise together during Thanksgiving week. Their group of 15 - including grandparents, aunts, uncles, nieces and nephews - sailed a Royal Caribbean cruise in honor of Simon's parents' 50th wedding anniversary.

"We have some traditions, but for the most part, we like to mix it up," said Simon, 46, president of Simon Public Relations Group. "We're not really married to anything or feel like anything has to be repeated."

It helps that her parents haven't always had their heart set on a specific holiday tradition - they were the ones who suggested the family take the trip Thanksgiving week after the suggestion for an August cruise brought up too many conflicts. Simon's son would have missed soccer tryouts, and her daughter's bat mitzvah would take place right after they returned. Plus, her sister-in-law had just had a baby.

While relatives may fight a family getaway, Stanfield-Hagert says that the key to success is telling loved ones the move isn't meant to offend - especially grandparents who might feel entitled to see their grandchildren on the holidays.

"Recognize that they will be hurt, and they will wonder why you're doing such a mean thing," she said. "Then explain that this is about what your needs are right now. It can feel like a betrayal. But it's not. It's growth."

Then compromise, either by arranging a visit at another time or including the family member that feels left out, especially if he or she is older and can't travel far.

Eventually, the new tradition will be accepted.

Alberta, the salon owner, suggests to his clients that they make a holiday getaway as well.

"They complain about all the stress that they have and what they have to do in preparation for the holiday," he said. "Why don't you just take the money and go away with your family and enjoy each other? They can't seem to tear themselves from what they think they should do."

If you've thought about making a holiday exit, you still have time. The economic downturn has created some travel opportunities.

"There's a lot of holiday space out there," said Bush of Park Avenue Travel. Hotels and travel agencies, he says, are being more flexible by relaxing the minimum-night requirement or allowing customers to take special vacation packages over the holidays - options that usually would not be available.

"People are waiting to see what's going on and they're going to make a decision two or three weeks out, where in the past, they would have been out of luck."