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Chris Satullo: Love at first sight doesn't last

 

That’s quite some first date they’re having, Sarah Palin and the United States of America. 

I’d be the last to deny that love at first sight can last. It happened to me 30-odd years ago.
 
But, generally, the odds in favor of infatuation morphing into something lasting and healthy are not good.
 
What begins with soulful sighs often ends in shouts of anger and broken crockery, to be remembered later on with a shudder.
 
I’ll admit it.  I was wrong out of the box about the surface appeal of this pairing. While I could see that Palin was a fresh face with an appealing life story, I didn’t think the crush would be this strong or last this long.
 
But, at that time, I’d only seen the Facebook photo. I hadn’t yet seen the video where Palin presented herself for our adoration. After I saw her convention speech, all that perfect-pitch schmaltz and sass, that mischievous glint in the eye, I realized what we were dealing with here was a star.
 
But here’s the thing: Like many people eager to be loved, Palin wasn’t exactly truthful in that eHarmony profile she offered to us, her potential suitors. Like many folks on a matchmaking site, she committed a few canny evasions, several half-truths, and at least one whopping fib.
 
She offered the Bridge to Nowhere fiasco as a shining example of herself as a brave steward of taxpayer dollars. The truth of the tale is that she was avid for this notorious bit of federal pork until it got too spicy politically. When the heat rose, she flip-flopped like any other calculating pol. Taking credit for squashing it? That’s just a flat-out lie.
 
Will this, and the other flaws in her flattering self-portrait, ever cost her? Will this roaring infatuation fade in time for cool, light-of-day evaluation to occur?
 
I hear about and from many Americans who are over the moon for Sarah P., and I wonder. Political scientists tell us: A majority of Americans vote from the gut, not with a brain ticking off a checklist of issues and credentials.
 
Once a sense of personal identification with a candidate kicks in, most of the stuff on which wonks and editorialists dwell gets kicked out the door.
 
I also hear about and from many Americans whom this drives crazy.   The question is: Will these folks, frantic at how Palin has scrambled Democratic chances, make the same mistake so many hyper-anxious parents make with their love struck teens? Will their over-the-top carping at the object of affection, and their stern “you’re being a fool” warnings, only drive the infatuated further into the arms of their newly beloved?
 
This is the syndrome gleeful Republican strategists are trying to set up.   After years of subjecting Hillary Clinton to venomous, sexist attack, they will – with relish and without shame – cry sexism should any Democrat seek to subject Palin’s record or statements to even the most basic scrutiny required of a vice presidential nominee.
 
Speaking of shameless, Palin herself dished 10 minutes of the most in-your-face sarcasm at Barack Obama during her acceptance speech. Can she really have the nerve to complain about any barbs tossed back her way?
 
Well, that’s been a favorite ploy in conservatives’ playbook for years, using theatrical outrage to enforce double standards that benefit them. They’re the Peyton Mannings of that maneuver.
 
 Witness the ludicrous talk-show howling that Obama’s “lipstick on a pig” remark about Republicans’ attempts to dress up their abysmal governance record was a brutal, sexist attack on poor little ol’ Sarah.
 
This all leads some anxious Democrats to chant “Kill, kill, kill.” They want Obama to go after Palin the way Karl Rove goes after his targets.
 
Mistake. There are ways to make fair, factual yet devastating critiques of the governor of Alaska without descending to Rovian levels of falsehood and ferocity. You don’t have to pretend that Sarah Palin’s the worst politician in the world. She’s far from it.  She is indeed likable. But she’s also far from the national hero she’s being made out to be right now.
 
Remember, on her first date, she lied to America’s face about the Bridge to Nowhere. Pound that home until people get it, because it explodes the flattering myth that Palin is a straight-talking guardian of taxpayer interest from that temple of rugged individualism, Alaska. Alaska is actually the welfare queen of the 50 states, more reliant on federal largesse than any other.
 
Make sure that all the dedicated, exhausted Moms out there who admire Palin’s cheerful balancing act know that, if she had her druthers, Harry Potter would be banned from the local library. 
 
Make sure everyone gets a long look at the vindictive streak that lies behind the twinkling eye. As mayor and governor, Palin’s solution to pesky people who opposes her will seems to have been: Fire ‘em.
 
And make sure, most of all, that all parents get a clear picture of what happened when John McCain asked Sarah Palin to be his running mate: Given a choice between her ambition and subjecting her teenage daughter to searing national humiliation, she threw Bristol under the bus.
 
It’s hard to tell right now, but a presidential election is not actually an episode of Northern Exposure.    Quirk is not a qualification. 
 
Sarah Palin would be next in line to the presidency, behind a man who, if elected, would actuarially be more likely to die during his first term than any president we’ve elected in modern times.
 
This is not a first date. It’s a marriage with our lives on the line. Let’s go slow. 
 

 


To comment, e-mail csatullo@phillynews.com.