It was foretold in ancient Gnostic scrolls found at Qumran. It was foreseen by history's most famous supermarket tabloid reporter, Nostradamus: The universe will either die, or, like, become so much funner on Nov. 23, the day child megastar Miley Cyrus turns 16.

Fact, that day is so momentous that American prophet Mickey Mouse couldn't stand to wait and decided to throw his own party. Thus the spectacle Sunday at Disneyland in Anaheim, Calif., which hosted a party so ridiculously flamboyant, so frivolous, Marie Antoinette would have been proud. Miley even sang a couple of tunes, as did her pa, Billy Ray Cyrus. Celeb guests included Jennie Garth, Steve Carell, Cindy Crawford, Tyra Banks and Jennifer Love Hewitt.

Organizers say 5,000 Miley devotees paid $250 a head for the privilege of crashing the party. That adds up to a nifty cash gift of $1,250,000. Not bad for a day's worth of partying.

Her Achilles' heel, the Achilles tendon

Print model turned model-on-TV Brooke Burke of Dancing With the Stars yesterday told L.A. radio station KBIG-FM (104.3) that Olympic beach volleyball champ Misty May-Treanor, 31, may have to bow out of the dancing contest because of an injury she suffered Friday.

"It's such a sad situation. She did hurt her Achilles tendon. I don't know if she tore it or ruptured it," Brooke said on the air. "She's out of the competition. Just like that, it's over for her."

A rep yesterday said Misty's status would be addressed on last night's episode of Dancing.

Damon, the triathlete

The Miami Herald says that Matt Damon completed the Escape to Miami Triathlon on Sunday, but he got through the running portion as a member of a relay team with his stepdad, Jay Jones, and friend Barry Hetherington.

Brad said his bro, Ironman hopeful Kyle Damon, talked him into entering the triathlon.

Kimmel again for AMA's

Late-night gabshow king Jimmy Kimmel has been chosen to host the American Music Awards for the fifth time in his career. The Nov. 23 event, which will feature performances by Pink and the Jonas Brothers, will be beamed live from L.A. on ABC.

Orly Adelson, president of Dick Clark Productions, the show's producer, called Kimmel "a masterful host with incredible spontaneity and wit; audiences can expect a great night." Kimmel was bashful, modest, in reply: "I agree with Orly completely."

'Entourage' encore

HBO yesterday said its how-not-to-be-a-celeb guide, Entourage, would be back for a sixth season next summer.

Shakira backs Obama

Singer-songwriter Shakira, who volunteers as a UNICEF goodwill ambassador, yesterday announced that she supports Barack Obama's bid for the White House.

Lust in our hearts . . .

Oh, there shall be much on Dec. 3, when Heidi Klum, Alessandra Ambrosia, Selita Ebanks, Doutzen Kroes, Adriana Lima, Marisa Miller, Miranda Kerr and a gaggle (or is it a school?) of other top-rated international models who are known as Victoria's Secret Angels will parade, prance and posture on CBS for VS's holiday lingerie runway show, taped earlier in Miami.

Isn't it interesting how the show's function as a consumer ad adds a veneer of respectability to what would otherwise have been labeled porn by the networks?

Drama at Q Awards

Rock icon Meat Loaf, 61, yesterday gave music fans a scare when he left in the middle of the Q Awards ceremony in London for medical treatment of an undisclosed malady.

The singer was unsteady on his feet and spoke incoherently when he accepted the Q classic song award for "Bat Out of Hell." He left the event soon after. His rep said Meat Loaf has been suffering from vertigo.

Meanwhile, Gwyneth Paltrow's hubby, Chris Martin, did her proud: His band, Coldplay, picked up two prestigious Q prizes - best album for Viva La Vida or Death and All His Friends, and best of all, for best act in the world. Paltrow was not at the show.

Angelina: I'm sooo tired . . .

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt made their first public appearance since the birth of their twins, attending the New York premiere of Angie's new flick, Changeling, on Saturday.

London's Daily Mail says Angie admitted that she's "exhausted" dealing with her six kids.

And she said she gets so little time alone with Brad. "Even if we lock the door, the children come knocking," she said.

"But it's fun and it's lovely - the thing about having six kids is once you've passed three or four it's so crazy anyway that it's just more chaos, and it's all OK."

Coda: To veep or not to veep

"I was at a function, and a bunch of political types were there. And John McCain was there. He came up to say hello, I said, 'Look, don't even ask it. I will not be your vice president. I have to be on the top of the ticket.' " Thus quips Dirty Harry star Clint Eastwood to People mag.

Huffman helps out a shelter

USAToday.com reports that Desperate Housewives star Felicity Huffman was in New York yesterday to help launch Animal Haven's 10th annual pet adoption program.

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