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Ellen Gray: 'CSI,' 'Two and a Half Men' tag-team on episodes

TWO AND A HALF MEN. 9 tonight, Channel 3. CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION. 9 p.m. Thursday, Channel 3. WHAT HAPPENS when TV's No. 1 comedy and CBS' No. 1 drama trade writers?

TWO AND A HALF MEN. 9 tonight, Channel 3.

CSI: CRIME SCENE INVESTIGATION. 9 p.m. Thursday, Channel 3.

WHAT HAPPENS when TV's No. 1 comedy and CBS' No. 1 drama trade writers?

Does "Two and a Half Men" get peanut butter on "CSI: Crime Scene Investigation's" chocolate?

Worse, does "CSI" get blood all over "Men's" swanky beach house?

Fans of sweeps stunts will find out starting tonight, when "Two and a Half Men" premieres an episode, titled, somewhat ominously, "Fish in a Drawer," that was first outlined by by "CSI" show-runners Carol Mendelsohn and Naren Shankar.

Robert Wagner and Jenny McCarthy guest-star and "CSI's" George Eads has a cameo.

On Thursday, it's "CSI's" turn. Called "Two and a Half Deaths," it involves the murder of a sitcom star and it's from a story by "Men" show-runners Chuck Lorre and Lee Aronsohn.

As stunts go, it sounds like a network programmer's dream, but Lorre said the crossover was his idea.

"I mentioned it as something ridiculous to do to Carol about a year ago," Lorre told reporters on a conference call last week. "It went viral from there."

Asked if he'd always wanted to write a drama, Lorre replied, "No, burning inside of me was the desire to do an autopsy on a sitcom diva."

A little background: Before he created "Two and a Half Men" and "The Big Bang Theory," Lorre was best known for having written for a series of women on "Roseanne," "Grace Under Fire," "Cybill" and "Dharma & Greg."

Draw whatever conclusions you like, but his "CSI" episode involves the star of a comedy named "Annabelle," played by Katey Sagal.

As for "Men," "the biggest challenge for us was, you know, doing a comedy with a murder in it," said Lorre, who wouldn't say who's dead. "I mean, generally our stories are a little lighter."

Here's how Aronsohn described the collaboration with their "CSI" counterparts: "They gave us the forensics and the plotting of the crimes, and we kind of put in our little ha-has."

"We put in our little ha-has? You're diminishing us," interjected Lorre.

What the "CSI" writers learned about comedy, said Shankar, is "that puns are the lowest form of humor."

"We learned it again and again and again," said Mendelsohn.

"Carol and Naren were so helpful to us. Because [the forensics stuff] is what they live and breathe," said Aronsohn. "We couldn't even follow the conversation. We learned a whole lot about plotting and reverse-engineering stuff, that I can't believe they do it every week."

"I'd be very suspicious. I think they're all on steroids at 'CSI,' " Lorre said.

For her part, Mendelsohn had never been to a sitcom taping.

"It was just an incredible experience and I laughed myself silly," she said.

"It's probably one of the more dramatic 'Two and a Half Mens' and one of the funnier 'CSIs' that you'll see," said Aronsohn, who let Lorre have the last word.

"We managed to make a mutt out of both shows," he said.

'Flying' low

Documentary filmmaker Jennifer Fox, a New Yorker who grew up in Narberth, turns the camera on herself and her complicated love life as well as on her friends - and even her mother, Geraldine, who still lives in the area - in the six-part series, "Flying: Confessions of a Free Woman," which premieres at 9 tonight on the Sundance Channel.

In the opener, we learn about (but don't see) Jennifer's married lover and meet her friends Pat, a 50-year-old about to undergo surgery for a brain tumor, and L'Dawn, a 42-year-old whose financially disastrous divorce has forced her to move from New York to a family home on the Shoshone Indian reservation in Wyoming.

Depending on your taste for voyeurism, "Flying" is either gripping or cringe-inducing. Even frequent fliers might want to pack Dramamine. Or Prozac.

'Cranford' restored

Programmers at WHYY (Channel 12) seem to have come to their senses regarding the second installment of "Masterpiece's" "Cranford," which they originally intended to pre-empt - showing it on only a separate digital channel - to make room for a Mother's Day rerun of the 13-year-old miniseries "Pride and Prejudice," packaged with pledge breaks.

There'll still be pledge breaks ("fewer," according to an e-mail from the station), and there'll still be "P&P," too, from 3 to 9 p.m. next Sunday.

But from 9-10 p.m., the station will air "Cranford," the latest production of PBS' "Masterpiece," returning at 10 with the last hour of "Pride and Prejudice."

With, of course, pledge breaks. *

Send e-mail to graye@phillynews.com.