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Ronnie Polaneczky: For the kids: If you see something, say something

IT WAS THE hair weave that got to me.

Someone in Charlenni Ferreira's life had used it to hide the head gash that Charlenni had suffered. The wound had been stuffed with gauze, then hidden beneath the weave. The injury was old enough that skin had begun to grow aross the gauze.

There was other abuse, of course. We've heard about the broken ribs that caused the infection that killed Charlenni. The broken hip that made her limp. The sexual acts that would have been a horror for a 10-year-old.

Hearing of those assaults, I felt too numb to cry. I wondered if last year's banner child-abuse news - the release of the 2008 grand jury report into the slow, sadistic and fatal neglect of little Danieal Kelly - had deadened me to feeling any more grief over the monstrous ways that grown-ups can betray the babies they're supposed to protect.

But, oh, the hair weave.

Anyone who knows little girls knows how much they love to have their hair made pretty - whether bent into curls or blown smooth, gathered into sweet pigtails or styled big-girl elegant with a glittery clip or weave. When the work is done, and they behold themselves in a salon mirror, or the mirror held in a smiling mama's hand, they beam with pride so unabashed, it can bring tears to your eyes.

And that's what finally brought tears to mine - the image of Charlenni, in agony, having her terrible wound yanked by a weave meant to hide from the world just how little her contemptible parents cared whether she lived or died.


 
 

Last Wednesday, Charlenni's father, Domingo Ferreira, and stepmother, Margarita Garabito, were arrested and charged with murder following Charlenni's death from what police described as the "ongoing torture" of her life.

Four days later, Ferreira, coward to the end, hanged himself in his jail cell. Garabito's preliminary hearing is scheduled for tomorrow. Neighbors from C Street, in Feltonville, where the family lived, have vowed to pack the courtroom.

"I want to look her in the eye," one neighbor told me. "I want to tell her to rot in hell with Satan."

The neighbor told me how she'd watched Charlenni "lose her spirit" in the last year."

Another neighbor, Charles Bednarczyk, told the Daily News that something might've been wrong because Charlenni always appeared "sort of frozen. But as soon as she would be allowed to go down the street and play with her friends, it was almost like she blossomed."

Others noted how she seemed to shiver with pain or dread.

No one, apparently, thought to contact the Department of Human Services, the way a school nurse had, in 2006 and 2007, when she suspected that Charlenni was in immediate danger.

But why would they? Overall, neighbors say, they rarely saw Charlenni. Besides, every parent sees "deprived" children of one kind or another all the time - you know, kids being raised in a way we wouldn't necessarily raise our own.

We also know that to suggest placing a child under state supervision is to suggest interfering with what we consider a basic right in this society, which is to raise our children as we see fit.

So we may regard a call to DHS as an act requiring more than just a feeling that something isn't quite right.


 
 

If Charlenni's painful life and excruciating death teaches us anything, my hope is that it will make us dial DHS anyway, to err more on a child's right to well-being than on a parent's right to be boss.

I say this, I realize, not knowing whether the investigation into Charlenni's death will eventually implicate DHS itself.

But for better or worse, DHS is the best we have.

Besides, it's not like we citizens are expected to wait for solid proof before acting in other matters in which safety is paramount. Right after 9/11, when the nation was desperate to prevent more attacks, we were implored to contact the Department of Homeland Security if we suspected terrorist activity among us.

"If you see something, say something," the slogan went.

If we can enlist America's eyes and ears for matters concerning national security, surely we can do the same when it comes to acts of domestic terrorism - the insidious kind that occurs behind closed doors, waged against those too vulnerable to dial the phone themselves.

To report suspected abuse to DHS, call (215) 683-6100. All calls are confidential.

E-mail polaner@phillynews.com or call 215-854-2217. For recent columns: http://go.philly.com/polaneczky. Read Ronnie's blog at http://go.philly.com/ronnieblog.

 

Comments   
Posted 06:20 AM, 10/27/2009
e.mears
Dear,Ronnie I could not have said that,no better than you did thank you for writing what I was thinking.
Posted 06:42 AM, 10/27/2009
EVA9601
Why didn't the teacher or school nurse contact DHS this time around? She was limping for quite awhile, asking the parents to take her to a doctor is insufficient-(uh, hello, they're the abusers). This child was failed not only by her "parents", but by everyone around her including the family friends that partied at the home with the great sound system.
Posted 10:33 AM, 10/27/2009
mokey1057
how about someone else living in the home. how about personal responsiblity. her injuries and what happened to her means that all 4 people in that house felt as if it were okay to do this to her. The neighbors heard nothing? I don't believe that either.
Posted 12:29 PM, 10/27/2009
Mary
I, too, cannot stop thinking about this poor little girl. And the hair weave haunts me. We all want to point fingers but we need to figure out how a "family" is capable of such savagery. Are there community centers, churches in the community that could have reached out? How do we stop this madness?
Posted 01:33 PM, 10/27/2009
scargosun
People like to blame DHS when cases come up like this. There are not enough people working at DHS to do the job well. That's the bottom line. Do you know why? Where do you think budget cuts hit first? Remember that in the next election - any election. Also, hindsight is 20/20. If you were not in direct contact with this 'family' you cannot know whether or not there was a real problem. This child was probably beaten in to submission; "Don't tell anyone or we'll hurt you" type of threats. She knew no other life, she didn't know how to ask for help.
Posted 01:35 PM, 10/27/2009
nephillygirl
I hope the neighbors do show up at the hearing tomorrow, but where were they for the past year or so while this child was being tormented? Even her school classmates knew she was being abused, but Charlenni, in her terror, begged them not to tell anyone, according to previous stories. These children need to be counseled to talk to their teacher, school nurse, SOMEBODY they trust if--oh, who am I kidding--WHEN they see this again. A previous story noted that "grief counselors" were brought to the school after Charlenni died; that effort would be better spent in teaching children what to do if they or a friend is being hurt by an adult, even if that adult is the child's parent or step-parent. The pain this defenseless girl went through tears at my heart. May she rest in peace.
Posted 01:49 PM, 10/27/2009
mat4044
Please take the stepmother off suicide watch, let her inflict pain upon herself and then burn in hell with the so called father? Charlenni is an angel in Heaven never to see those animals again.
Posted 02:14 PM, 10/27/2009
hiphophooray
Amen. I watched new reports and read an article featuring interviews with neighbors. Several of them said they suspected something was wrong. Then why in the world didn't they make a call or leave send an anonymous letter? There can be no excuses now--even if there could have been before. We know how heinous our nextdoor neighbors can be. Start snitching rather than waiting to buy a stuffed animal for the next memorial.
Posted 04:41 PM, 10/27/2009
jlacerra
I am at a loss to understand people such as these parents. If they hated or didn't want the little girl, then why not just give her up? I cannot begin to understand the daily hell that was this child's life.
Posted 05:51 PM, 10/27/2009
PhillyS1980
Unloved children grow up to be unloving parents. You can't give away what you don't have.
Posted 06:53 PM, 10/27/2009
Magistra
Yesterday, I sat on the bus in front of a mother with two children under the age of 3. The only words out of this woman's mouth were "Stop it!" and "Shut up!" Then I heard the older child, a boy, reciting quietly to himself "Stop it, stop it, stop it, stop it." The reason these things never end is because future abusers are raised to be abusive. Add to that the proclivity to torture and kill helpless animals, and you can see how a subculture of abuse is nurtured and encouraged. I looked at the mother's face. It was sad, angry, tormented, and troubled. And the only words she is teaching her babies are "Shut up" and "Stop it!" I hope they investigate the boys in that household and see if they are implicated in the little girl's abuse. Tragic, tragic, tragic.
Posted 08:11 PM, 10/27/2009
CountryRose
Ronnie, that is a terrific take on Homeland security -- "Home" Land! Should be where a child is safe. "If you see something, say something," should be a motto for all of us. Thanks.
Posted 10:22 AM, 10/28/2009
katekat
The problem with a case like this is at this point we can't really prove that DHS didn't do all they could do, or that the neighbors should have done more, bc like they said, they didn't see Charleeni that much. But right now, we can blame Domingo and Margarita (calling them her dad and stepmom would be an insult to parents everywhere). These abusers continuiously tortured this girl. But I can vow that if I ever see a child who looks like they may be abused, I will report it. For Charleeni <3
Posted 01:24 PM, 10/28/2009
MrsDamian
Thank you, Ronnie.
Posted 03:16 PM, 10/28/2009
Angela M. Liddle
Ronnie: Thank you for stating very clearly the simple message "if you see something, say something" in an effort to better protect our children. I am the administrator of PA Family Support Alliance, a statewide nonprofit working to prevent child abuse. We train thousands of professionals each year how to recognize and report child abuse and we encourage citizens to understand that they have a responsibility to protect children by reporting suspected abuse and neglect. Please help us to spread the word that while DHS may certainly be called to follow up on a case, per our states Child Protective Services Law, all calls of suspected child abuse should be made to ChildLine at 1-800-932-0313. For individuals interested in learning more about the recognition and reporting of child abuse please visit www.pa-fsa.org.
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