Now I can top it.

A little girl is allowed to die a horribly painful death, deprived of water, food, the most minimal level of care.

City agencies are blamed for the death, and rightly so. But the real killers are her parents, who kept her in a dark and filthy room so they wouldn't have to hear her cries for help.

The parents are charged in the death, treated as a homicide. Then they sue the city for not stopping them . . . from killing her! Throw in a few lawyers, and we have a new and improved version of "Philly chutzpah."

Like everyone else, I've been transfixed by the tragic case of Danieal Kelly. I didn't want to write about it, unable to find words that had more than four letters. I thought it better to let the grand jury report, an uncommonly eloquent legal document, speak for me.

But when Andrea and Daniel Kelly decided to desecrate their daughter's memory by filing a wrongful-death suit against the city, among others, silence was no longer possible.

So - I apologize . . .

To anyone who ever provoked me by telling a stupid-lawyer joke.

To anyone who ever misused Shakespeare's line "First thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers."

To anyone who ever said that my profession was filled with bloodsuckers and parasites.

I apologize because I no longer have the right to be offended when people ridicule my colleagues.

Brian Mildenberg and Eric Zajac are the reason for that.

These two men agreed to represent the Kelly family in the civil suit filed on behalf of Danieal's estate. (How tragic that a 14-year-old has an "estate.")

According to a report earlier this week in the Daily News, the attorneys contended that it would be wrong to paint Daniel and Andrea Kelly as "money-grubbers."

Frankly, that description is one of the kinder ones that come to mind.

Fortunately, the law boys realized how repulsive it was to have these parents suing the city, so they did some triage and tried to have them removed as administrators of the estate.

Of course, this doesn't mean they still won't be able to cash in at their child's grave. As grieving parents, they'll try to collect for the loss of their daughter's "companionship," or as we in the business call it, "consortium."

Pass the Pepto-Bismol.

The fact that these two lawyers can actually justify filing a case that seeks to profit from the barbaric death of a little girl runs counter to everything I learned at law school, which drilled into my head the supremacy of ethics over success, of moral justice over legalisms.

Mildenberg and Zajac have done nothing illegal.

Everyone has a right to file suit. You can't travel on a train or pick up a newspaper without seeing my colleagues hawking their expertise in "getting you what you deserve."

Just the other day, drinking my coffee at Starbucks, I looked out the window and saw three taxis with the same ad: "Injured? Call 1-800-Shyster."

Well, maybe I got the number wrong. But the sordid fact is that there are members of my profession perfectly willing to turn your pain into their gain. For a reasonable fee.

I suppose that's the nature of the business. Like everyone else, lawyers need to make a living, so there's nothing fundamentally wrong with a little bit of creative marketing. But there's a line that shouldn't be crossed - and Mildenberg and Zajac have broken through to the other side.

Before seeking to remove the parents as administrators, the lawyers argued that the parents would probably never see any money if damages were awarded. They were doing it for the couple's other kids who the counselors describe as "impoverished children in foster care."

I'm sorry, but the brothers and sisters of Danieal don't deserve one penny of our taxes. This is blood money that would be derived directly from the screams and the spasms of their sister.

To award damages in this case would be a monumental perversion of the legal system.

Some will argue that if the defendants are held responsible for Danieal's death, they should pay.

Maybe.

But the money should be put into a fund for battered children. Not one blessed penny should go to Danieal's so-called "family."

Or to the men who've

given chutzpah a whole new meaning. *

Christine M. Flowers is a lawyer. See her on Channel 6's "Inside Story" Sunday at 11:30 a.m. E-mail cflowers1961@yahoo.com.